“Reverse My Birth”

It was terminal for him
You have a choice
Air makes daddies thin
You mute my voice

And a little boy
Can’t breathe
Mournful days
Can’t be seized
Spoke of new beginnings
Now strangled
Subtly by hairy angels

Choosing life
Over an overdose
Swallowing daddy’s lies
Of tomorrow somehow close

Living life
Wading in mortality
I can’t say Goodbye
Angels on my windpipe
Won’t let me breathe

No one fathoms closure
Abandonedly
I can’t achieve my rapture
With decay in me

Growing men
Can’t be free
From ghosts
that don’t sleep
Angels have
Heaven on Earth
I just want to reverse
my birth

Choosing life
Over an overdose
Swallowing daddy’s lies
Truth is death
Is so close

I live my life
Heavy in mortality
I didn’t say Goodbye
I turned men into angels
Now they are free.

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“Without Heaven”

In circles I find you
When I fall again
God designed you
At the core of him

I’m special once more
Like brisk dawns
Before tortured noons
For a second I soar
Before love dies too soon

You were here again
When I saw him
He put down his mask
And you went back

Skies are not blue
Till you open them
God is finally true
When there’s love to send

The sun of his heart
Don’t say I’ll get burned
I’ve learned from the start
You’re never again
For me to earn

You land here again
As he walks up to me
Your disease sets in
He grows sick of me

You’re so happy
You’re so cured
When he touches me
And feels so pure

But we all suffer
We’ll all break down
We’ll never be younger
Forgetting
Each other’s sound

It can’t be you again
I mistook him
He fooled each sense
Without Heaven
He’s so dense.

“Your Flicker To My Flame”

I was still a child
Disliked for who I was inside
My heart too wild
They ran to leave me cry

You rebirthed my vision
To see I’m meant
To love myself
When I feel vacant
There’s no killing hand
I’m dealt

Death wishes engulf my mind
You guide this spirit of mine
Serenity keeps demons tamed
Like your flicker
To my flame

They don’t have to know me
Who they are
Can chase them from me
I can forgive quietly
Without believing
They have to break me

Maybe I’m not orphaned
Maybe laughter
Is from life you gave me
I can pray to Heaven
And still smile in the life
You saved me

Death engulfs me
You guide me
Serenity has demons tamed
Like your flicker
To my flame

My life won’t forever feel
Ultimately deadly
Peace of mind can be real
Like sweet sanity

They won’t always
Make me feel
Like a handful
I’m made of your love
They easily steal
Not only their scared souls

Death wishes engulf me
You guide this spirit in me
Serenity keeps demons tamed
Like your flicker
To my flame

You rebirthed
My vision
I see I’m destined
To love myself.

“Wise Enough”

It’s unwise
To skip a pill
I’d be otherwise
Criminally ill

It was unwise
To try seducing you
To look in your eyes
And say I Love You

But when it’s wise enough
To share some of their love
When they say it’s wise
To again look into my eyes

Come see my life without you
Make the circle game true
I’ll wait for them to say it’s wise
To join me at the ocean’s tide

It’s wasteful of me
To wait for your heart
To open
I wish you’d see
How I’m so independent

You don’t have to lay
In my new bed
You don’t have to
Touch me one bit
Just come back
And repair my head
Return the puzzle piece
Missing from my spirit

And when it’s wise enough
To be your own
Kind of tough
When they say it’s wise
To dry my eyes

Come see what you carved
Feed the boy you starved
I’ll wait for them
to say it’s wise
So you can bring me sails
One sparkling sunrise

Must you utter my name?
They define my name
As insane
You could say
You’re off to an old friend
You could say
He needs his anxiety
To come to an end

Can I be wise enough?
To win some of your love?
Once upon a time
I was wise
You cried for my cries

I know you wonder
About me
I know you never
Lied to me
The love songs
Can’t be disguised
I’ll just listen till they say
I am wise.

“Beyond Suffering Galaxy”

I close my eyes
One more solitary night
They’re clarified
Of the ghost
Of your sight
Of all the lies
Of any salvaging might
Your cutting disguise
Lifts as I’m left with fright

I felt saved for a second
Fairytales have book ends
I was merely confined
To love that held me blind
My life that felt so saved
Was only a road devils paved

Your haunting eyes
Made our future look bright
But I realized
You never streaked twilight
And each sunrise
Was never secured tight
As I arise
God gives me
The most secure light

I was never saved by you
You never brightened
My blues
I was only confined
To your limited time
The only spirit that saves me
Transcends your
Suffering galaxy

Superheroes with egos
Only collect zero
As rain still pours
You never score

I prayed so hard
Still lost all my heart
But I was saved
By divine way

My open eyes
On this solitary night
Are so clarified
Of ghosts of your sight

Oh, how you lied
Of any salvaging might
Your breaking disguise
Lifted and left me
With such fright
But a spirit saved me
Beyond your suffering galaxy.

“Fears of Backbones”

I gave you
Joy to feel
You can’t make
Peace as real
I made evolution
So simple
I’ll never be
Head over heels

When tears nearly
Drowned you
I chased to ring
Your freedom true

I had the lines
I found your truth
I calmed your mind
Recaptured your youth

You said my embrace
Was a twister to engage

I suffered as well
Still scattered about
Childhood Hell
Not fully equipped
For the well of kindness
To take a quenched sip

Empathy never before
Slipped inside your eyes
I ran to be the umbrella
Of your sights

Only I find
How you can live
With missing mind
God to forgive

You say my hold
Is too strong and cold

I narrated in your ear
My life no one would hear
Now I can hear your fears
Of backbones like spears

You could land close
And I’d wake you
You on your toes
With stand I make you

You walk away from me
Say I’ve too much audacity.

“Reverse My Birth”

It was terminal for him
You have a choice
Air makes daddies thin
You mute my voice

And a little boy
Can’t breathe
Mournful days
Can’t be seized
Spoke of new beginnings
Now strangled
Subtly by hairy angels

Choosing life
Over an overdose
Swallowing daddy’s lies
Of tomorrow somehow close

Living life
Wading in mortality
I can’t say Goodbye
Angels on my windpipe
Won’t let me breathe

No one fathoms closure
Abandonedly
I can’t achieve my rapture
With decay in me

Growing men
Can’t be free
From ghosts
that don’t sleep
Angels have
Heaven on Earth
I just want to reverse
my birth

Choosing life
Over an overdose
Swallowing daddy’s lies
Truth is death
Is so close

I live my life
Heavy in mortality
I didn’t say Goodbye
I turned men into angels
Now they are free.

“Cast My Own Spell”

Elixirs are worlds distant
My hungry stomach tightens
I asked my worlds to vanish
There was no love to relish
I’d waken feeling inspired
New life was an aimless liar

I lament long windedly
Till I’ve let go softly
Thoroughly

If I reach for my past
I can’t wish myself well
Human hearts outlast
Life lost to dry spells

You can waltz
Back through my life
Would you kiss me
Through your demise?
It’s easy to be void
Of all reason
Why I buried in the Earth
All their seasons

You resemble another toxin
Who overwhelms me too
With toxic love within

I laboriously collect
Long winded words
Like voice chased by birds
Crooning hurt

I cling to my past
And won’t wish myself well
Reason is easy to outlast
I’ve lost my life to dry spells

We’d board carousels
During our neediest time
I deeply fell
Your future made it
A crime

You left the carnival
Tearful clowns ignored
I deeply fell
I leave you what I wore

I have no words at your gate
Only what I can’t take
Like love you helped make

And they bought my past
I’m free to wish myself well
There’s reason I’m an outcast
So I can cast my own spell.

“Dominator”

You claimed such love
Because I was so loveless
You gave me a nice home
When I was so motherless

But if I loved you
There was still emptiness
If I wanted you home
Our nest was
Always pointless

I couldn’t say
When you’d stay
It was never you
To my rescue

You were the only one
Who had the sun
You dried me empty
And would never revolve
Around me

Quite the dominator
I waited patiently
Your misunderstood control
Served as structure for me

I quivered for my set time
Then I ached for more of you
I hungered for your gaze
To utter what was true

I couldn’t decide
To have you at night
I could never lay
Beneath your flesh glazed
Only you were him
Taking us out on whims
You wouldn’t be empty
With your whole life
Together with me

Inside your playroom
I’d submit to be your prize
Laying beneath the moon
Your lust would be undisguised

I’m supposed to comprehend
Our playtime must have to end
If I didn’t take so kindly
To your control
Your whips and chains
Might take their toll

As I couldn’t say
When you’d stay
I howled for you
To never be rescued

When your heat was done
He’d always be your Sun
You master your destiny
And you once mastered me.

“I Wish I Had Your Courage”

I look at your face
I see a man who traced
Who he saw within me
And all I could be

I lacked reasoning
I was unbecoming
I didn’t understand
Why you’d cast aside
My hand

I wish I had your courage
To simply let go
You saw me
As your strong one
I’m strong in my hold

My friend says
You’re beautiful
Your beauty
Is spiritual
My belief system
Is now less
Somehow you think
It’s for the best

There’s no God within
Holding on in vain
Is my biggest sin
Through melodies I pray
You hear each night
My heart has chased

I wish I had your courage
To simply let go
I seemed to be
Your strong one
I’m strong in my hold

They can’t understand
Why I rhapsodize your hand
They say
My health is compromised
But I’m uplifted
By all that I’ve memorized

You embody my roots
I’m alive in you
When life kills my truths

I’d stand back
Let you breathe
Please come back
And be one with me

But I wish I had your courage
To just let go
Of whom was
Once your strong one
As my strength let go
With your hold.