“Too Young To Teach”

Giving my best
Drained the life in me
I lived my each test
Strength you drained
Was first instilled in me

You were less
Till we met eyes
I gathered my tests
And saved you
From demise

I was too young
To teach you
You took advantage
Of me
Only to take me
For granted
And walk away
With my heart’s creed

My love
Is not to be trashed
I led you to feel
Hoping you’d stay
You can’t feel each ash
As you burnt your guru
In flames
And flew away

I can love
With love you’ve
Never felt
My love rose you above
A loveless road
That leads you
To a bottomless,
Despondent well

I was too young
To teach you
All you handed me
Did not teach me
What I already knew
I taught you
And you stripped me
Of my beliefs

I own sacred truths
You corrupted my youth
You taught me nothing
Except men are
Abandoning

I own fresh truths
A sad man
Replaced my youth
All you handed me
Has been replaced
Like innocence
By disenchantment
By a kind face

I was too young
To teach you
Giving of myself
Landed me
Life behind strange eyes
I never knew
A life that can ruin me.

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“Bittersweet Blessing”

Like a high riser
Once so lavish
Like harmless flowers
Each god relished

My one Father
Looks over me
So God has yet
To take me

This could be
A bittersweet blessing
When I was last blessed
I was cursed
With such heartbreaking

I wonder if I should be
So embracing
Of anything
Resembling a promise
My past makes it
A bittersweet blessing

I long to rise high
And love each dawning
And open my arms wide
But it was quite
The crashing

My spirit guides me
To safety
So God has yet
To take me

This could be
A bittersweet blessing
But being blessed
Broke me
With a heart’s cursing

Should I be
This quickly embracing
Of any word of promise?
My past makes this
A bittersweet blessing

These red flags
These warning signs
As my feet heavily drag
On broken china
Once so fine

It’s bound to hurt
Somehow
All things have a cost
It’s natural
To have doubts
I will surely
Have some loss

This will be
A bittersweet blessing
Like last time
I was blessed
I learned life
Is about losing

But how I yearn
To keep an opening
In my heart
To any promise
How sad this has to be
A bittersweet blessing.

“Givers And Takers”

You gave
A lusty smile
I acknowledged
Your beauty
You gave joy
To an abandoned child
I gave you back
Vitality

You took my falling heart
You caught it
I wrote you
Zillions of songs of love
You built a home
For my spirit
I gave you feeling
You were short of

Givers, takers
Lost souls, fakers
Where’d you lie?
When you lied?

You gave
You took
I gave
I took
Our needs led us
To be forsook
As our tears dry
On a hook

We gave more
Than was okay
We take
We’re stripped of it all
Only we can catch
Our own falls

Forgiveness
Is the least of our worries
Boundaries
Are blurred anyway
We look back
On past centuries
And wonder how
Prisoners get away

We’re givers, we’re takers
Vulnerable and the fakers
We played both roles
Both roles took our souls

I gave
You took
You gave
I took
We were forsook
We cry on a hook

All we gave
We needed to take
Now we’re depraved
The other can’t see
The other cries
So we forsake

The one
we wholeheartedly
Gave to
The one
We took from all we
Followed through

Beneficiaries
Left high and dry
Boundless lovers
Bestow boundless love
Till they have to fly…

Givers and takers
So vulnerable
Such a faker
We have to be forsakers
Now we’re both achers

I gave
You took
You gave
I took
Blurred in our book
As we cry
Still so hooked.

“Peace of Mind”

Crying together
Unifying all
We’ve weathered

Expressing my being
Catching words
As they’re purging

Aligned
With altering skies
Thrusting myself
Into all sad eyes

Rationalizing
My abyss of emotions
Believing angels
Hover over the oceans

I felt peace of mind
Was holding love
I had faith
Love remained kind

I’ve never been aligned
With God
Just questioned
Why I’m questioned
Why I was visualized
As so odd

I don’t believe
I’ll ever possess
Peace of mind

I can feel
Roots of my distress
It’s this world
so blind

Our eyes meander
Our souls stammer
There’s never full
Comprehension
Nor complete
Balanced motion

I thought if I died
You thought
If you’d confide

My demons would be left
To fiend
Your sins
Would be redeemed

But just when we can
Breathe
We search for more
Willing to commit
Adultery

Such conflicts
Take us on a new plane
We evolve momentarily
But we’re eternally insane

Joy is dead
In my vocabulary
I let peace leave
My weak mind

Universal alignment
Leaves my sensory
I’m forever blind

Kids get college degrees
They can afford luxuries
Lights of self medication
Opportunistic husbands

So the ones that truly love
Are better off up above
Till they’re aligned
With their grief
For peace lies in
Letting go of leaves

I’ll never innately
Feel peace in mind
I’ll always emotionally
Look at my world
As so blind.

“A Different Choice”

You were smacked
In your intuition
Your heart was slit
Where you’d listen

Your dreams came true
A family harmonic
Inside a castle

But you get blue
And question life
You chose to revel

Their words are so pretty
For the choice before me

If you’d listen
To your voice
You said you’d make
A different choice

When passion is dead
There’s no tumultuousness

Love lingers
Elsewhere instead
Explosive passion
Can be so luscious

How can you erase
Passion you codependently fed into

You forced an end
To the chase
But your eyes
Would glisten
If I looked at you

You’ve been stolen away
If I existed the prior day
If you heard
Your inner voice
You said there would
Have been
A different choice

You say it was only
Sheer vulnerability
But if God gives you
A love to stew

And a boy you dreamt of
You’d make a life
Your heart dreamt of
You’re just playing safe
I know I was not merely
A mistake

I led you to your heart
A childlike man keeps
Your mind and heart apart

My voice reminds you
Of your intuitive voice
And how you’d make me
Your choice.

Special One

You were
The special one
My radiant sun
Rendering darkness
Undone

I overlooked
I am special too
I forgot only I
Paint my skies blue
Only I
Make my dreams true

It’s about my heart
And what you
Failed to understand
You broke me apart
Only I knew the pain
I can withstand

It’s about worshiping
Myself
Revering you
Led to my fall
You can’t know
How I felt
You’re not a bird
Who knows my hearts call

I hold what I believed
You held
I was too much for you
When I fell
You don’t have strength
To hold my shell

I’m the one
With your evolution
I’m the one
With that sweet sensation
Only I
Can recognize Creation

It’s about my heart
You can’t understand
You shattered me apart
My heart was too much
For you to withstand…

It almost slipped
My mind
Into a gutter
Nobody can find
That I’m the reverent one
Only I ignite
My morning sun

Entering your mind
Is only a God you fear
Who can be
Rather unkind

And within my heart
I now fully understand
Whenever I break apart
God knows the pain
I withstand
I cling to my spirit dear
Revering you
Led to a bruised fall

I don’t care for
Pseudo heroes
Anywhere near
Be the butterfly
Disregarding my call.

“Forgotten”

How different I am
Has almost made me die
I take inner lives
And say they’re glorified

Different fruit in my stem
May never reach the sky
As emotions I carry
Have made many
Run and hide

I am forgotten
I’m too easy simple
To forget
There’s resentment
And much regret

I hold all of you inside
So brightly memorized

I’ve heard glory
All I say is Goodbye
Some hearts grasp me
Others leave me to die

Wandering disenchanted
After I’ve been perceived
As too queer
Floating so disappointed
I’m too frightening
To stay near

I am forgotten
All I give is never enough
I can’t be genuine
When my edges
Become rough

But all of them
Are treasured inside
Gratuitously memorized

Don’t tell me
You’ll always stay
Don’t promise me
I will feel loved

Reality is
You turned away
And promises
Stayed untouched
And I’m forgotten of

I don’t know
Where I end up
I don’t know
How I’ll be remembered
I ruminate on their touch
By pain I’m tethered

I don’t know
What to do inside
As all of them are
hauntingly memorized.

Forgotten

How different I am
Has almost made me die
I take inner lives
And say they’re glorified

Different fruit in my stem
May never reach the sky
As emotions I carry
Have made many
Run and hide

I am forgotten
I’m too easy simple
To forget
There’s resentment
And much regret

I hold all of you inside
So brightly memorized

I’ve heard glory
All I say is Goodbye
Some hearts grasp me
Others leave me to die

Wandering disenchanted
After I’ve been perceived
As too queer
Floating so disappointed
I’m too frightening
To stay near

I am forgotten
All I give is never enough
I can’t be genuine
When my edges
Become rough

But all of them
Are treasured inside
Gratuitously memorized

Don’t tell me
You’ll always stay
Don’t promise me
I will feel loved

Reality is
You turned away
And promises
Stayed untouched
And I’m forgotten of

I don’t know
Where I end up
I don’t know
How I’ll be remembered
I ruminate on their touch
By pain I’m tethered

I don’t know
What to do inside
As all of them are
hauntingly memorized.

Illuminated True Colors

You’ve taught me
I’m undeserving of
Being loved
For who I am inside

You unraveled
Became a hard lesson
A season
Passing painfully inside

You’ve shown me
The true colors
Of those who appear
To be angels sent

Then they’re so demonic
And so impure
Your wings were winded
Then you became absent

You sought me
For all I’m made of
To never return love
But I should not
Have had expectations

You found me
But uncovering you
Falling into you
Lost me
In devastating confusion

You’ve illuminated
True colors
Of heavenly creatures
Allegedly sent

But you’ve abandoned me
Because you’re impure
I winded your wings
You were swiftly absent

There are still
Misunderstandings
There are still
Unanswered questions
You claim to have vanished for me
A supposedly
Selfless abandonment

If the others
Remained silent
If you listened
To your sad heart
You’d hear
You’re not in confinement
You’d hear me
Wherever you are

But I already know
Your true colors
You’re no angel sent
You’re self-absorbed
You’re impure
I hope you go far
With newly winded wings
How do you feel
When you’ve made me
Forever absent?